Broken clapper

I have never rung the bells for a funeral before but I did so on Friday for half an hour before the service. We planned to ring for 25 minutes and then the tenor was tolled for 5 minutes.

Six minutes before the service and 1 minute before we would have stopped anyway, "Stand!" was called following a very loud bang from upstairs. The ringer of the 5th discovered that the clapper had fallen out of his bell or parted company with it in some other way. We were quite safe as there are two wooden floors between the ringers and the bells.

As it was a funeral we were ringing half-muffled. The video below shows muffles being put on some bells, but it is a brave chap who walks amongst the bells whilst they are up. I certainly wouldn't!

Congratulations

I have visited all sorts of churches over the last 60 odd years. There is only one church which find unattractive and almost ugly inside. Obviously I shall not name it and I do not generally name specific places on this blog.

I will make an exception today because I really did like the way the reordering has been done at Thrapston.

The interior looks splendid and the way the furniture has been selected fits well with the building whilst providing the necessary comfort. There is a spanking new kitchen/servery area at the back on the West side and the stairs up to the balcony and ringing chamber have been carpeted (I think they were on my previous visit) and new banisters installed in well-chosen wood (oak I think).

It may be that the style of worship would not suit me but I fully support all that has been done and the way the layout opens up the nave and makes the worship space fully functional. Although I suspect it is not much used, they have retained the pipe organ which did surprise me a little.

Well done St James, Thrapston!

Things in churches

On my recent travels I have found wooden boxes for donations in two churches. Not only have these not been locked but they were not even attached to anything. The thinking here is that if unlocked they will not be broken into with brute force. If not attached to the wall the church fabric will not be damaged. Better to lose the cash in the box than have something more unsightly happen. This does not make it a very attractive proposition for would be givers. I did leave a donation in one box as I had collected the church key from a nearby farmhouse. I didn't put anything in the other box.

I also found a Visitors' Book; they are very common. They are also a form of history as some go back a long way - this one to 1963. I was last at this church in 1977 but I don't think I signed the book (I didn't check)

Open

Earlier in April I posted that I find many churches locked and I know that this is indeed the case. However, I have found a few open ones, admittedly off the beaten track.

Church for Kiddies

My reader (!) will be aware that I favour a certain kind of churchmanship. I came across a video which sums up all that is wrong - from my perspective - with church worship in the 21st century.

I understand that the C of E wants to be approachable and welcoming: it may have been stuffy and remote in the past and a church style of the 1950s-1970s may not attract people these days. That said, I find plenty wrong with the video below (for as long as it stays on YouTube).

• A church service should not start with someone shouting "Good morning" as is so often the case now. Yes, this is not a formal service where the vicar has processed in; he has to get the congregation's attention somehow. Oh wait, I find that even if I try to set an atmosphere as an organist I have to contend with chatter and noise.
• At 57 seconds we see and hear the vicar leading the clapping. Again, one has to hear the reading just before this to set it in context but I would feel very uneasy in this setting. What is the point of clapping? This is not an old peoples' home where one is trying to get geriatrics to join in with enthusiasm. It all seems false to me. I accept that this may have been shortly after Lockdown (March 2021) and people may have not been too happy to sing in an enclosed space so clapping was an alternaive. See how I am getting to see the other side of the story?
• Then they go outside (this is obviously an edited service). I have never been a fan of singing outside and the trite "Hosanna" they are singing with a tambourine backing is less than dignified IMHO.

I have never been to Haddon and this was just one video which popped up as a result of some searching I have done in the area close by.

One must remember that, despite what derision I may pour upon this act of worship, the vicar may be extremely good with his flock, at the bedside of ill people, comforting the bereaved and everything else that an incumbent does. It is not his fault. He may have had a job before entering the priesthood and be quite worldly wise: I do not know. He will have been trained for his role and will be relying upon what he has been taught is the correct way to lead worship in the 21st century. It may be that he comes from an evangelical tradition; who knows.

So apologies to Haddon; this video just illustrates a point or two.

My question is, "Where does dumbing down stop?"

Modern wedding couples

I suppose I ought to applaud couples who want to marry in church given that so many places are able to host the ceremony these days; but what has happened to standards these days?

I find it appalling that people are so rude or disorganised that a wedding due to start at 1430 does not begin until 1501 and on a Sunday too when people are giving up their time to ring the bells (in my case as I was not at the organ). Every last detail was included on page 1 of the service sheet: the names of the page boys, bridesmaids, lesson readers, and a whole host of others (cake maker, hairdresser - no, not really but they might as well have been listed)

Vicars ought to be telling brides to arrive on time. In my youth it was common for there to be several weddings on one day, spaced out to allow time for photographs and so on. I did hear tales of brides' mothers almost coming to blows if the previous wedding overran; "It's our turn now!"

Modern couples like to throw money at weddings and the reception was at a very lavish stately home near here which I will not name. The couple were transported by coach and horses. However, when we finished ringing, the 3 bridesmaids had been left behind, all alone, as transport arrangements had not been thought through.

The service sheet had several typing errors and hardly anybody sang the hymns anyway. Worst of all, many guests were late arriving and were smoking right up to the church porch; they started again as soon as the service was over.

To cap it all the organist was terrible and had no idea how "Shine, Jesus shine" went. At least they only wanted one verse.

Going to church today?

For many years, as a young child, I did not go to church but - occasionally - my parents would decide to drop me off at Sunday School in the afternoon. I have come to realise that this was because my grandmother may have had a say in the matter and they felt guilty: also I suspect they wanted some time without the children about.

Still in my childhood and as a chorister, I used to have to go to Peterborough Cathedral on a Sunday morning for two services: Eucharist and Matins. I went again for Evensong in the afternoon.

When I became an organist I had a 0930 service to play for and, from that point (in the early 1970s) I hardly missed a week. I went from there to university as an organ scholar. Now, I did have a year or so off when I was doing my PGCE but I used to go to bellring for Evensong and stay for the service at a church a short drive from my hall of residence.

When I started teaching I did not have an organist position at first but that was soon rectified and was the case until 2005, with a few breaks. After that, going to church was part of my job at a boarding school.

Now I am retired my life has changed. Yes, I do get up and go to play when I am doing deputy work (although this has evolved into my having become the regular organist at 2 churches on 2 Sundays).

On my Sundays off I have the option of going to ring at the local church some 5 minutes walk away but, to be honest, I do not have the motivation. As I have implied before, I am pretty bored with what I call 'low level' bellringing which is the wrong attitude to have. Ringers ring to call the faithful to worship and we can do that equally well with round & call-changes as we can with difficult methods.

I do not think this is the Ringleman Effect, but perhaps a variety of it. I think the only reason I have been keen to go to church - as an organist - is because I am so obviously contributing and essential to the service. It also keeps me interested. I get bored very easily. New methods, new opportunities and recognition all spur me on to do better. Getting into a rut has the opposite effect - CBA as the acronym goes.

These days there is a lot of CBA about. People can attend virtual church online, or watch later (and skip the boring bits). For me, going to church is not about meeting other people - I LOATH 'The Peace' like Mrs Beamish, as I've said before.

The whole point of this blog is really for me to explore the C of E: after all, nobody is reading what I write. So I am not at church today neither have I gone to bellring. Have I thought about God? Yes I have; as well as my mortality, spirituality, my place in the universe and so on. Isn't that what church is about? So, do I need to go?

If they were not there

It has often been said that if churches were not there, they would be missed even by people who do not attend very often. Churches are usually big buildings and used as venues for events of all kinds.

• Flower Festivals
• Bellringing competitons
• Concerts
• Displays

The Diocese of Exeter website says, "In the Middle Ages, churches were used for a variety of functions such as courtroom, school and library, and hosted meetings, elections, debates, plays and festivities. In fact, until relatively recently, churches were multifunctional community centres. After the nineteenth-century restriction of secular uses of churches, attitudes are now changing again."

The whole page is HERE.

Crack

I was quite shocked to see a huge crack in a church wall recently. I was even more shocked and saddened when I obtained the key to the church to look round and I saw that the crack was evident on the inside of the transcept wall: I didn't take a photo of the inside crack. 'Crack' is putting it too lightly. This was a church in a small village. There was an harmonium and no organ which always suggests a small congregation to me and, hence, no source of funds for a repair. I left a small donation of £10.

It seems to be an allegory for the C of E.

Stained Glass

I have not really bothered about stained glass for the last 60 years or so. Recently it has started to make an impact on me. There is one particularly good (modern) example in a church where I play the organ but I have not had an opportunity to take a photo of it (i.e. I forgot). Here is one, from a church near Peterborough, dedicated to those who lost their lives in WW1.

Caterwauling

I caught the BBC's Choral Evensong today as I was driving home: I seldom listen to it which I know is odd. It was from the Chapel of Merton College, Oxford, recorded in November 2021. I could add a link but it may not stay more than 29 days from today.

The music list was -

• Introit: Now the green blade riseth (Trad. French, arr. Terry)
• Responses: Cheryl Frances-Hoad These were bizarre and should be banned; hence the title of this post
  
• Psalm 105 (Murrill, Nicholas, Buck) One of these chants was terrible and extremely dissonant, I assume it was the middle one.
• Canticles: Stanford in A
• Anthem: Te Deum in G (Vaughan Williams)
• Voluntary: Symphonie Romane, Op 73 (Moderato) (Widor)
  

Benjamin Nicholas (Director of Music)
Simon Hogan (Organist)
Owen Chan (Organ Scholar)

All the singing was excellent but I do not understand why composers have to subject the congregation to such dissonance. Is it just to show how clever they are?

Hymns and drumkits

The RSCM has started a new initiative called Hymnpact. If that link stops working try HERE.

The samples they have put up all include a drumkit. So it seems that one cannot worship God without percussion (I suppose that is Biblical if you look at Psalm 150 but "Praise him upon the loud cymbals: praise him upon the high sounding cymbals" doesn't mention drums).

Rhythm and vitality are certainly important in church music but there is a general feeling in circulation that traditional organ playing and 'old' hymns have lost their impact, especially for young people. I see more and more drumkits in churches these days.

The other side of the coin is that the organ can provide the sense of majesty which is so important in worship and this depends upon the skill of the musician and the size of the organ at their disposal. A small worn out instrument is, I admit, not going to have the effect of a large cathedral instrument.

When I came across Beauty in Sound's 2022 Easter Virtual Church, it seemed to me that the last thing required was a drumkit.

I suppose it depends upon the tradition in which one has been brought up

Standby

I visited a church recently which had an organ but it was clear that they also use other forms of music. I was dismayed to find all the items pictured below were left on standby. As well as a potential (if minimal) fire hazard it is not very environmentally friendly.

Chatter

I played for an Easter service today and what surprised me was that it was not too long; just an hour.

I had been asked to prepare the organ part for an anthem but illness had reduced choir numbers. So we all met half an hour before the service to run through it and see if it was viable: it was. We had the full quota of 4 hymns and this anthem during communion in addition to the Gloria, Sanctus, Benedictus and Agnus Dei. I played a new piece as a voluntary.

I also played a Buxtehude Chorale Prelude before the service and a quiet piece by Healey Willan. What I did find a little irritating was the loud chatter before the service. There seems to be no habit or tradition of quietly settling in one's pew and getting ready for the service - I was taught this as a child.

Another thing I find irritating is the way the momentum of the service is ruined at the end. It should go

• Post communion prayer
• Hymn
• Blessing
• Voluntary

Unfortunately we had notices about upcoming services and Banns after the hymn. This was an anti-climax. We had just sung "Thine be the Glory" and, surely, one wants to have the blessing and then depart: by all means chatter at the back of the church where the organist cannot hear.

I was spoilt for choice on topics to blog about today as Revd Richard Coles has spoken about his retirement. It is a good article, as far as I have got, so I will hop over and read the second half now.

Rewilding

There is now a trend to rewild churchyards which I suppose is a good idea in many ways.

One problem is that this often means a headstone become overgrown with ivy. Again, this would be fine (in some ways) if the detailed were recorded first. So often one tries to read a headstone to find that it is illegible.

Good Friday

These days Holy Week passes me by much the same as any other week. This is because I am not involved in 'the church' or Christianity for a multitude of reasons. In my youth Holy Week (culminating in Easter, obviously) was a busy time and, when I became a regular organist, there were several services to play for.

One feature of times past was the Three Hours Devotion. One cathedral website says -

This is the traditional preaching service for Good Friday...Very often, the three hours is interspersed with hymns, prayers and silence so that our reflection can take many forms. This service aims to finish at 15:00, the time that Jesus died on the cross.

So it still goes on but I have not attended one since about 1975. It was a real marathon and my only duty was to play 3 or 4 hymns during the time. People were permitted to come in for a part of the service but I had to stay the whole time. I found ways of filling the time; these days I guess I would take my mobile phone!

I have attended Easter Vigils on Holy Saturday too. A small bonfires is lit just outside the church and there is a slow procession into the church, stopping three times when the priest sings "The Light of Christ", gradually rising in pitch each time.

The Holy week services make me feel uncomfortable and I suppose that is the point. We are meant to share in the passion of Jesus and his suffering. It is also the case that people like me want their religion to be nice and easy and slotted in to a convenient 'window' of the week.

To attend a 3 hour devotion service requires discipline which even the disciples of Jesus lacked: it is significant that the words are similar - discipline and disciple. Being religious requires staying power and I think I used mine up years ago.

One ex-chorister friend of mine used to say that he doesn't go to church any more because he feels he is 'in credit' after all the services he had to attend as a boy.

Latin and vernacular speak

I am no linguist: witness my Grade E at French 'A' level in 1976. Similarly, I was hopeless at Latin.

I have, of course, sung plenty of Latin texts and so I can convert (I hesitate to say translate) some Latin into English. It is obviously easier when one knows the English anyway. So "Qui sedes ad dexteram Patris” is "(Thou) who sits at the right hand of the Father" and Pater Noster is how the Lord's Prayer begins.

In my last teaching job, which involved training the school's church choir, the Head said to me, when I was planning my first Carol Service, "You aren't going to pick lots of 16th century Latin carols are you?" This was because he thought that all organists (from the same stable as me) were dead keen on Latin church music. I do agree that an ordinary congegation members do not know what a choir is singing about when they use a Latin text so they just have to sit back and admire the music.

I am really glad that I was exposed to Latin both at school and in my church career and, I think, were I to study it now I would find it more of an intellectual puzzle than a punishment. (Note - I do not enjoy Sudoku puzzles because they remind me too much of working out music timetables)

Most people do not meet much Latin in church which is fine. It is also the case that many hymns contain English vocabulary which young people neither understand nor care about. How many 10 year olds know what a Paraclete is - do I really? When I was a chorister I sang, in the psalm 48 "Mark well her bulwarks" There is a useful page of difficult words HERE.

It is the case that hymn language can enrich one's vocabulary so we encounter phrases such as "tempestuous sea", "resounding all the day" and "With every fleeting breath" as just 3 examples.

There is a trend in worship to move away from 'traditional' hymns and just keep singing "Oh Jesus, Jesus, I love you" I also cite

Make my life a prayer to you
I wanna do what you want me to
No empty words, and no white lies
No token prayers, no compromise.

Controlling People

Years ago, somebody said to me that religion is just a way of controlling people, through the fear of going to hell.

These days there are other ways in which people are controlled. Covid has shown this partcularly well and, as this is a short post (because I am going out)

EDIT

I had put an interesting video below but it was removed by the channel: I wonder why! He always has interesting things to say.

Deputies

Our vicar has Covid. This means the churchwardens are in a panic because replacements are like "hen's teeth" (or is it hens' teeth?). Retired clergy do often stand in for priests who need to be away but as we are talking about Easter Sunday it appears they are few and far between. I thought about that for a while. Why should spare clergy be more rare at Easter? It can only be because the C of E does not have enought clergy anyway and because those parishes which do not have a priest particularly want to celebrate the eucharist on Easter Sunday: this can only be done with a bona-fide (licensed) priest.

As it is, some services in our benefice are taken by (senior) members of the congregation, not - as far as I know - by lay readers. Actually I have not come across a lay reader in a long time.

It is hard enough for an organist to find a deputy. Appeals often go out from  Organists' Associations to their members: I am doing my bit from June to August in that I do not now have a spare Sunday.

There must be a register of retired clergy, I thought, and Mr Google says there is a register of those who are not retired, but I cannot find one of retired clergy.

"There are many reasons why someone might not be on the National Register of Clergy, for example, they could be taking a temporary break from ministry, are retired, or are between roles."

Non Nobis Domine

Where does inspiration come from? After a musically hard day yesterday I opened my emails this morning to find that I had won first prize in an organ music composition competition. Over the years I have written what I consider to be several decent pieces (not all for organ) and I remember the process of writing four of them, knowing that the music was going exactly how it needed to go. In two cases I was emotionally moved as I wrote. In some ways I was channelling an unknown force.

There is another often played piece of mine which I really like (blowing my own trumpet, or flute in this case) and, whilst I can picture myself writing it and adjusting the final page, I have no recollection of the creative process. Other pieces have had to be hewn with a great deal of effort, or cobbled together quickly.

At the Evangelical church I attended briefly, spontaneous contributions from the congregation were welcome and expected (not ‘tongues’ or glossolalia, as that phenomena was only allowed if an interpretation could be introduced almost straight away by somebody else). Once or twice I felt sufficiently moved to speak out – something I would not have done in the C of E, nor would it have been welcome or appropriate! To this day I do not know what came over me and I have not had any kind of religious experience (if that is what it was) since: quite the reverse. I am not counting the urge to speak out in a Café Church discussion, only a couple of weeks ago.

There is something to be said for the view that traditional church worship is stifling spirituality and replacing it with chatter, notices and announcements and what a friend of mine calls “Show and Tell Church” (the “What have you to be thankful for this week?” time, when people just say things to fill the awkward silence). Perhaps this is why people are staying away or going to the more ‘experimental’ type of church. They seem to like exuberance. [I would feel most uncomfortable at a Gospel service.]

So there, I guess, is the reason behind my love of Evensong. It is safe, predictable, cosy and nostalgic. One does not have to be creative, inspired or channel any unknown force. Don’t get me wrong: I am not seeking to be any sort of channel, but it does seem to me that – as one local vicar said of a rival church – [people/churches] ... are afraid to allow God in their worship.

I hesitate to thank God for my success – and the inspiration – in the competition because it is too easy to be grateful when things go right and to wonder if God actually exists when things go sour. I am many things but I hope I am not a hypocrite (if that is the correct word). That said, I do find the thoughts behind “Non Nobis Domine” compelling.

My tasks today

My short holiday last week was refreshing but, while I was away, I had a text to ask if I would fill in for a complete run of "The Gondoliers" (piano only) for a mate. So yesterday I collected the score and watched a video to help me prepare for today. It took much of the afternoon to work out Act 1 and I spent a further hour on Act 2.

I am somewhat tired today but the service I am playing for this morning is not until 1100 and consists of 3 hymns. Still I have to get dressed, drive there, play, drive home, grab a quick lunch and set off.

I suppose many people would pray that this afternoon goes OK. I don't believe God intervenes like that so I just hope that I don't make a complete idiot of myself: God cannot help with that. He gave me a certain amount of talent and I have lots of experience, but I know I have plenty of limitations.

A short post then, today. And I am not sure what I shall blog about tomorrow.

Sacraments

Yesterday I wrote about Evangelical churches and those groups who, to me, appear to set up their own religions and who want to 'play at churches'.

For a while I attended an Evangelical church but I will not bore you with how this came to pass. I was surprised that I enjoyed the services once I got used to having no music to look at and not knowing the hymn tunes. [ASIDE: I picked up some useful repertoire which I then introduced at school and which has been useful in the years since, such as "In Christ alone"]

The reason I left this church was because, after several weeks (months?) they wanted me to become a full member and the only way to do that was to be baptised into their church. Woah! Baptised for a second time? My friends were horrified and I too thought this was a bit 'rum'. I had been taught that baptism is a once-only sacrament. (A priest had once told me that when he was newly ordained he baptised twin boys and swapped their names by accident: it could not be undone. How the family resolved the issue I am not sure.)

Many people only go to church to be Hatched, Matched or Dispatched. Of these the first and last can only occur once! It is a fact that the C of E used not to allow divorced people to remarry in church but I believe the hard line has softened (it could be up to the local vicar these days): it is certainly possible to get a church blessing on a 2nd, 3rd or 4th marriage. I know a lady who remarried in Coventry Cathedral.

My point is that at least the C of E has regulations (even if they have relaxed somewhat in the case of marriage) and it is very wrong of Evangelical churches to make new rules and demand obedience to them. At the time I joined I was in a bad place so I was vulnerable. Luckily I was not in such a bad place that I had lost my wits. I realised something stank and I left soon afterwards.

At the time I was attending this church it was very clear that they abhorred homosexuals but it seems they have now changed this to hating the acts which might occur in such a relationship whilst supporting LGBTQ people in their flock.

The trouble with churches is that they are attended by people and people - humans - have so many different ways of behaving that one size does not fit all. When I was a child in the 1960s I was made to believe that one size did fit all ("At the name of Jesus, every knee shall bow" and all that).

Ah, the church: changing to adapt to popular trends so as to keep bums on seats?

Why is the Church in decline?

I am just back from a short holiday. I had some bellringing planned and had checked with the towers that it was on. The Wednesday ringing was cancelled through lack of available ringers, caused by illness. There are 8 bells so, presumably at least 2 were ill and the other 6 didn't want to ring as there was no guarantee that I'd turn up to make 7; they did text me to say it was off.

Presumably, had the local band consisted of 12 ringers, 4 or 5 could have been ill but my point is that the whole company must be limited in size that to cancel was the only option. This may be because fewer people are taking up ringing, and that could be because fewer people go to church (not that ringers are noted for their piety!)

One reason attendance in C of E parishes is declining is that there has been an increase in the number of new churches planted (to use the term which seems to apply) in any given area. These are often Evangelical groups which meet in school halls and other large buildings. Newfrontiers is one such establishment and the Evangelical Alliance is another relevant body. There are several other smaller groups.

So, it seems that if people want to get together and 'play at churches' they can simply do so.

I will post about some negative aspects of this later. All I will say now is that there are only a certain number of people of faith to go around. Note that many non-conformist churches have closed (Baptists and Methodists) over the years. The C of E does not suit everyone but not all C of E churches are the same so it ought to be possible to find one you like. It is just that people have a 'pick and mix' attitude to worship these days and balk at being labelled as old-fashioned.

Me, I'm all for tradition: or am I!?

Books

 

I took this photo last Sunday and forgot to upload it from my phone. It is the bookshelf behind the organ bench and on it are stored books from yesteryear.

The Church of England managed with the Book of Common Prayer for many years then, at some point, somebody started to update the liturgy. By the time I was a chorister in 1968, Series II communion was pretty well established and a few years later Series III came out. These were again replaced by the Alternative Service Book (ASB) in 1980 a complete waste of time IMHO. Many churches invested cash in buying the volume which was obviously wasted.

Roll on and we now have the dreaded Common Worship of 2000. A more pathetic publication it would be difficult to imagine. Using it for communion services requires one to turn back and forth depending upon which Eucharistic prayer is used: to be fair, once one is used to the cue for the Sanctus one need not bother to follow the prayer, especially as various interjections and acclamations are seldom sung. I do dislike the many rubrics, symbols and icons which are meant to assist navigation of the book.

The line I REALLY hate is "that we may do justly". 'Do'? Who decided this? "That we may act justly" I suppose it means. See here.

The photo above shows the many volumes which are no longer in use, such as hymn books. Many places now use Hymns Old & New in which the harmonies and arrangements are of varying quality and the language has also been changed.

Ah, progress.

The faithful few

Churchyards need care and grass cutting takes time. Often this responsibility rests upon retired folk. Yesterday (on my short break away from home) a chap was cutting the churchyard grass. He must have been in his 80s, or approaching them. Cutting grass is not all that difficult but negotiating headstones, rather than merely repeating up and down routes on a domestic lawn, is far more demanding. Then there are low tree branches to avoid.

As the church loses the faithful through age and death, one wonders what will become of the loving care which has been poured over the grounds over the years. Will others step up to the plate?

Locked Churches

When I was young (I mean 50+ years ago) it was the norm for churches to be open for visitors. Over the years it is nearly always the case that churches, even in small villages (or perhaps particularly there with few 'watchers'), will be locked: they certainly will be in towns. As a young organist I could practise on Saturdays at St. John's, Peterborough because the verger - Mr Bateman - was on duty on Saturdays.

Mr Bateman was very old in the 1970s; I guess in his 80s. He taught me a very important lesson which was not to practise with too many stops drawn. Young organists like to make plenty of noise but to those listening it is just that - noise! He once came to the console and said, "Do you have to play so loud, it goes right through me?" I also feel that some organ music is more for the pleasure of the organist that the congregation and should be saved for a recital.

I have noticed that many modern players (on YouTube) use full organ quite a lot and also the pedal 32' reeds for French music. There is nothing wrong with this but I was taught to have something in reserve. At Peterborough the 32' was quite seldom heard, so the currency was not devalued. My first organ teacher told me that he would not always use the sole pedal 16' bourdon for hymns so that, when it was drawn, it was a real event. With advancing years and organs getting older and more in need of rebuilding (i.e. stiffer action) I do find myself using Swell to Great less because 2 manuals coupled together require some effort on a few instruments.

I wonder why the organ is locked at my church given that the buiding is also generally locked. Belts and braces I suppose.

Yet another sad testament on modern society where it is common for the dubious charcters in society to prey on churches, steal the lead from rooves and throw stones at stained glass windows.

Church language

I am uncomfortable with informal church language and much prefer established, traditional vocabulary such as that used in the service of Evensong, I do regularly notice a few peculiar sayings one only hears in church.

I suppose I can excuse "Let us pray" as the alternatives would be...

• Shall we pray?
• We are going to pray now
• And now we are going to have our prayers
• And now Roger Jones will lead us in prayer

The one which really makes me almost retch is "Please be seated". When do you ever hear that phrase other than in church? I presume it has developed because the alternatives are...

• Please sit down
• And now we sit (for the lesson)
• You may now sit
• We sit as (A, B or C happens)
• 'Please take your seats' might be used at a formal dinner function but 'Please take your pews' does not seem to work
  

At Evensong I have only rarely heard posture instructions because, if there are enough regular worshippers there, they lead the way. It is normal to sit for the psalms and stand for the Gloria, so I have heard "We sit during the singing of the pslams for the 6th Evening" (not that many places do a whole evening's-worth of psalms, as we used to when I was a chorister.)

I think my hatred of the phrase "Please be seated" is rooted in the patronising nature of the instruction which reminds me of the controlling nature of instructions uttered at Infant school. Praying was always prefaced with "Hand together, eyes closed."

There is also an element, in the phrase, of allowing people to do something which they really want to do but feel they should not do until invited. Being silly for a moment (and it is my blog) I can imagine

• Please feel free to break wind
• Please cough freely
• Please unwrap a toffee and crumple the cellophane
• Please feel free to let your child wander around church uninhibited

Once again, church language depends upon the person taking the service and, as priests become younger (in relation to me) and perhaps not from a church background they will use more chatty forms of speech.

When I was a chorister the Precentor used the neat phrase, "In the English Hymnal, number 51" Whereas, elsewhere, I have also heard the dreadfully patronising, "We turn now to our green books and find hymn number 51 which is on page [whatever it is] and we stand to sing".

Church Floodlighting

I said (yesterday) that I would blog about this and it ties in with other posts.

I attended a cafe service today (the 2nd of 2!) at which the leader again asked for feedback on the local Eco project. They are collecting old spectacles, plastic and doing other environmentally good things. They do not (as far as I know) have church floodlights - I will need to check.

It is a fact, however, that many churches allow people to sponsor floodlighting. Google 'sponsor church floolighting' and you will get hits. I found THIS and THIS.

I really object to churches being floodlit as this contributes to light pollution and it costs money. Yes, I know that the church does not pay, as the cost falls to the sponsor, but I find it totally unnecessary.

I may well join the International Dark Sky Association and do some research for them.

So, on the one hand the C of E is trying to be Eco-friendly and on the other it is burning fuel to light up buildings.

Confused? I am.

Yesterday - April 1st

My post yesterday about Organ Blowing caught out a few people although most realised it was a prank. I received the advice to phone the Bishop, or just resign. The point was made that what I had written was so plausible, these days, that those 'fooled' had thought it true. Add to that the fact that I generally do not go in for April Fool jokes. Had I tried to tell somebody those 'facts' face to face or over the phone I would have corpsed.

What I also did yesterday was to ring for a wedding. Who gets married on April 1st? My wedding was on April 2nd, 39 years ago because we avoided 1st: in the end the joke was on me but that's another story.

The photo below is the inspitation for this post. It is typical of the wiring found in many churches. Some places have been rewired but it seems the thing to do is to leave old distribution boards in situ, although I think these are all in service. This is another church feature which ordinary visitors do not often see.

Things which need power are

• Lights
• Organ
• Heating (radiant or the boiler pump)
• Sockets
• Alarms (if fitted)
• Data projectors (see a previous post)
• Floodlighting (the subject of a future post!)
• Clock winding motor (if fitted)

Any other ideas? Please comment if you think of any.

Blowing

To say I am annoyed is an understatement. I have just checked my emails to find one from the PCC of the church where I play once a month. It says that, due to the rising cost of electricity, I am not allowed to use the electric blower any longer: it has been disconnected.

Luckily, the organ has retained its manual blowing handle and the PCC are in the process of putting together a rota of people to man the bellows and watch the mouse as it wavers up and down during organ use. My concern is that, although many instruments do retain their hand blowing apparatus the leather in the lower section of the bellows may have dried out and become less flexible. This could result in cracks and ultimately leaks.

No calculations have been done to ascertain how many kWh the organ actually consumes but it has been decided that all hymns which have more than 4 verses would have had to have had their extra verses omitted. As a result, it was felt that a change to manual blowing was preferable.

Over a period of time a log book will be kept and in it the titles of my post-service voluntaries will be written, together with the number of pumps required to furnish sufficient air for the performance. Should I extended fermata by too much, or draw extra stops in subsequent performances (on a whim) which I did not use in the calibration exercise, then my pay will be docked by 30p per pump.

Currently the blowers lined up are as follows

• April 2nd A. Gale
• May 1st G. Borborygmus
• June 5th S. Puff

Needless to say I am looking now for a church which will allow me to play the organ as much as I like and without the need to enlist a companion with plenty of stamina.